I love pasta but I would usually feel bloated and uncomfortable after eating it anyway due to the gluten in the wheat, so it’s not a huge sacrifice to switch to gluten free pasta made from a whole grain. I’ve tried so many different GF pastas, fancy ones, cheap ones, and I keep returning back to the only one I like — Trader Joe’s organic brown rice penne. Here is a foolproof way to cook gluten free pasta.

Many or most of us have had their lives turned upside down in a matter of a few days, once the pandemic set in in mid-March . I find myself trying to second guess and imagine what’s going to happen in the year ahead, what our daily life will look like, what work opportunities may arise. I’m a planner and not being able to plan makes me feel anxious and ungrounded.

Now we suddenly find ourselves, across the globe, together in our isolation as we hide out from the latest enemy - the pandemic. Nothing in my lifetime has caused such a devastating upheaval as this — cancer didn’t even come close. At least cancer treatment had a finite ending and I was pretty sure I wouldn’t die. Afterwards, I thought rehabilitation and recovery would be my biggest obstacle to returning back to my “normal” life in a timely manner. But not long after I finished cancer treatments, my “normal” life was turned upside down, along with most everyone else’s.

I’m writing this blog post while stuck in paradise — Koh Samui, Thailand. It seems like going through the cancer experience a few months ago was just practice for the pandemic that took hold shortly after I finished my treatments. It has left me longing for the simpler times when cancer was the biggest of my worries, and I didn’t have an inkling that a virus could bring life to a standstill and global economies crashing.

KEFIR HACK: Probiotics are most effective when consumed as food —rather than in pill form. Coconut water kefir is my favorite probiotic drink and it’s easy to make here in the tropics or at home. Raw organic coconut water kefir can be prohibitively expensive when purchased at a top grade natural foods market but this hack is cheap and can be done while traveling. The probiotics that emerge with fermentation make kefir excellent for gut problems and for boosting immunity, something we all need more of during this Coronavirus scare!

I am in Ubud, Bali, on a mission to cleanse after going through chemotherapy and radiation for breast cancer. In order to do a deep cleanse I am fasting, combined with juicing and a mostly raw vegan diet.

The more I looked at pictures of food while fasting, the more I could taste elements of each dish. I tried to replay any taste and texture memories of dishes I’d tried, and made a great effort imagine any dishes I saw online that I hadn’t had yet. I felt myself getting excited by this food porn journey during my fast.

I’ve met a number of interesting people here doing extended stays in Bali. And almost all of them have been healers of some sort. Bali is known as the purification center of the world and it attracts spiritual types, particularly in Ubud. I can make an educated guess that there are perhaps more healers here per square foot than any other place on the planet. And that includes Balinese healers as well as healers from all over the globe.

Booking a ticket to the other side of the world present so many options. Too many! I’ve gone down the rabbit hole of piecing together tickets to get to Bali — finally deciding on a combination through Tokyo & Singapore. I’ve survived cancer; I can survive a little crazy travel schedule!

I’ve finished all my cancer treatments but instead of feeling elated, I feel slightly sad and uneasy about what’s next. Apparently cancer survivor depression is a common thing. As the Mayo Clinic explains, ‘Recovering from cancer treatment isn't just about your body — it's also about healing your mind.”

I’m pondering the start of the Chinese lunar new year. It is the year of the rat, and the new moon is in Aquarius, out of the eclipse cycle. I read a fascinating horoscope from Chani Nicholas and I want to include a quote here because it really solidified where I’m at at this moment in my life, nearly ending the period of cancer treatment and thinking about what lies next for me.

life force - qi in Traditional Chinese Medicine and prana in sanskrit. How to cultivate strong life force? I found out I’ve been doing it unintentionally and it has eased my cancer journey.

2019 will be remembered as the year of cancer but also the year of discovery. As much as I tried to prepare myself for how it was going to be, the treatments, the awful side effects, the endless medical appointments and poking and prodding and medications and poison going into my body, I prepared for the worst only to find it wasn't as bad as I expected. I had to give up trying to control my experience and rather, accept and surrender to it.